#187 Why God Refines What He Values

Fire can feel like failure, but what if it’s proof of value? We open with prayer and step straight into the heat—grief, questions, and the holy tension of Zechariah 13:9. Catherine returns after the tragic loss of her son and shares how God “dumped the drawer,” shaking everything loose so the hidden pieces could be seen, sorted, and ultimately redeemed. It’s a vulnerable journey from the big why to a deeper yes, where emotions aren’t dismissed but invited into God’s presence.

We talk about process as the place where value emerges: silver refined, gold tested, branches pruned. Hebrews 12 reframes discipline as love, not punishment. Catherine names the human responses—anger, fear, anxiety—and shows how even Jesus stepped away to pray under heavy weight and faced the cup with trembling surrender. That honesty leads to a surprising form of strength: stored grace you didn’t know you had until the storm hit. In small moments—a duffel bag, a memory, a quiet “I miss him”—grief remains a teacher that keeps the heart soft and open to God.

From diamonds formed under pressure to plants that thrive only after pruning, we explore how removal is not rejection but strategy. Catherine shares the phrase her son sparked—Hold On, Pain Ends—and how legacy becomes mission when love turns outward. If you’re standing in the fire, this conversation offers clarity, compassion, and a next step: ask God what He is doing right now, wait long enough to hear, and refuse to quit while He polishes what He already treasures. Subscribe, share with a friend who needs hope today, and leave a review to help others find this message. Your story can be the spark that helps someone else keep going.

A journey through spiritual refinement, identity, healing, and growth, learning how pressure produces purpose and reveals the diamond within.

An invitation to come and be a part of what God is building here at God's Diamond Network.  We don't have to go at it alone; this is where we will grow together.

Thank you for listening, and we hope you will return every week.

Transcript

Returning After Loss

Zechariah 13:9 And Refinement

Why Refining Reveals Value

The Drawer Dump: Life Shaken Out

Inside-Out Transformation

The Big Why In Suffering

Grief In Daily Life

Emotions Are Not A Sin

Surrender And The Cup

Surviving The Season Of Grief

Diamonds, Pressure, And Purpose

Seeing Meaning After The Storm

Hope: Hold On Pain Ends

Pruning For More Fruit

Legacy, Value, And Light

Community Invites And Feedback

Closing Prayer And Blessing

Programs, Support, And Next Topic

SPEAKER_00 0:42

Good morning, good afternoon, and good evening, somebody. Hello, hello, and welcome back one more time. God's diamonds in the rough. I am so glad to be with you. If you don't know who I am by now, my name is Catherine. I am simply a child of God chasing after what it is that He has called me to do on this earth while I'm here. Before we go any further, y'all know what we gotta do. We gotta pray. So, Father, I thank you so much for your grace and your mercy. Thank you, God, for allowing us, God, to be able to come before you. Lord, I thank you, God, for this work you put in my path. God, I just pray in the name of Jesus as we go through the season of refinement, God, that your will will be done in and through your willing servant. I pray, God, for everyone that you drew here, God, that what it is that you desire for them to do, to receive, to have, God, I pray in the name of Jesus, Lord, that you give me the words that would empower, that would restore, that would revive. God, use me to your glory. Have your way. In Jesus Christ's name we do pray. Amen. Amen and amen. Hallelujah. Amen. I hope all is well where you are. I hope you're having a great day. Um, we are here today to continue our conversation. What we've been talking about is we have uh just re-opened the door again. I, you know, I've testified that I thought that this season was over, I thought God's time is in the rough and was complete, that everything that the Lord wanted to uh be done in it was done, but obviously not, because I am here talking all about refinement. Um, you know, if you did not pay attention to the beginning or to the story as we come back into um the podcast, please go back and check out the last episode, which is episode number 186, and I share with the world exactly what has transpired over the last two years almost. No, actually, I believe the last episode, yes, two years almost, uh, that I put up was in October, a couple of weeks before my son passed away. Tragically, his life was taken through that of a gun. And so, you know, you know, it's a whole nother conversation, a whole lot, I'm sure, that as time as we go through this this season of refinement, that God will allow me to share with you depths of what happened and you know things that I am aware of, things that I'm not, and so, but I don't want to spend a lot of time there, but I definitely want to just highlight the fact that you know uh my son tragically passing away was one of many reasons why I know that God has drawn me into this place while I am serving in this capacity, and so if we look at that verse that we started out with for this entire month, the month of February, we're gonna be staying locked in on one particular verse, and it's Zechariah uh 13 verse 9. And I read it last week, and I'll read it again, and so it says, and I will bring the third part through the fire and will refine them as silver is refined, and will try them as gold is tried. They shall call my name and I will hear them. He says, I will say it. He says, Yeah, I will say, he said, It is my people, and they shall say, The Lord is my God. And so when we look at that particular verse and we look at our title, uh, why would God refine? Why does God refine what he values? Come on, y'all. We're gonna talk about why God refines what he values. Now, when we look at that word of of why, why would God do this thing? Like, why am I in the midst of what I'm doing or whatever I'm going through? Well, the key word that God gave me about today's topic is about process, you know. Process is one it is, it is it is the journey, yeah. Process is the journey that we have to go through to get where God wants to take us. And the thing that we have to realize, and what goes along with this topic is that there are some things in our lives that is devaluing us as his children, and so uh the process of refining is getting out impurities, getting out the things that are making you less valuable than you are without those things in it. And the text or the scripture, he said, I refine you as silver is refined. There are some impurities, some things that would bring that would devalue that silver if it remains there. And so, therefore, we got to kind of look at our own lives and say, look, and receive the fact that God is just letting us know that we got some things that are in our lives that are devaluing us. And those things we have to be uh willing to allow the process to work out. Come on, somebody, I need y'all to talk to me. I hope that everybody is following along with the direction that the spirit is leading us, and so the thing that that that that that God does, uh like when my son passed away, so like he took me. Uh and imagine, imagine you have uh something that you kind of just put everything and anything in. You put beads, you put rubber bands, you put paper clips, you put pins, you put little small pieces of it, you put this, that, and the other, kind of like that drawer all of us have in our household where we just put everything in it. Yeah. Well, for me, when my son passed away, it was like he took me and just dumped everything out on the floor. And the thing about it, look, when we dump everything out on the floor, if we don't do it carefully, I know somebody has done it in the room before. Everything will just go everywhere if you just dump it. You ladies, y'all know we dump our pocketbook sometimes, we just shake everything out because we look for something in particular, and everything is everywhere. Like some people's lives look like that. Like, Jesus, he will shake everything out. And we are left standing looking like, what in the world just happened to my life? Am I by myself? Talk to me. I'm pausing and I'm pausing intentionally. Yes, I I I know I'm not the only one because that is what happened. And I said, Oh my god, what am I supposed to do now? I was just, I, Catherine, I can honestly admit that, you know, as I share my own personal testimonies uh of survival, I guess you could say, like I was the one that just when things happen, I could just pop back up, pop back in, and as if it never even happened and keep on moving. Well, this was the one of few times where it really impacted me in such a way that I stopped moving. Is that anybody else in the room? Have you had people removed or walked away? Has that happened to you and it and it touched you in a way that nothing else has? Look, I promise you, is he's dealing with the inside, he's dealing with what's going on in the inside of you, and when he's working on the inside, you're gonna see the fruit on the outside. Come on, somebody. Did you hear what I say? Look, I'm gonna say that again. When God is working on you, he works from the inside. You don't see the fruit, and you don't see that fruit from what he's doing on the inside until it's on the outside. Do you hear what I'm saying? Like those are those moments where you feel by yourself. You feel like nobody cares about you, you feel like nobody sees you, you feel like you got an inner war going on, I N N E R. He's working on the inside out. It's already been said, but I have written down in a note here do you find yourself alone all the time? Everything seems to be shaken. What does that mean? Does that mean anything to anybody? For me, everything seemed to be shaken, like there was a level of uncertainty in everything that I was doing in everything that I had done. Remember, as we started this little journey in this topic of why God refines what he values, we pointed out that one word process, process, process, process. Here's another phone. Why this always seems to be the next question that we have? I'm gonna say that again. Why is typically the question that we have, God, why is this happening to me? I've been faithful, I've been doing everything that I was supposed to be. Why in the world would you allow my son to be murdered? How? Why in the world would somebody that I thought, you know, my baby, the one who made me a motherfucker? Why in the world, Lord, would you allow this to happen to him? These are just some of the thoughts that played in my mind as I am just trying to figure out life again. Somebody is listening that's just trying to figure out life, and you'll have that question of well, why? And I'm here to tell you that look, at the end of the day, God is doing something on the inside of your life, and it's causing you to re-evaluate, it's causing you to look within, and you it's causing you to come running to him, it's causing you to question some things that I'm okay, I'm doing all right. It's causing you to take inventory, it's causing you to take notice. Because we can be going along, because I was going along, minding my business, allowing my children to grow up, you know, do what they do, you know, live their life. But for this, in this moment, I'm like, wait, hold on. What is going on? Like, even as I I am talking to you, I look and I see my son's remains on a shelf. I see in loving memory of I look at his pictures every single day from when he was a little boy, little boy, to a grown man. And I sit back and I wonder, what in the world happened? Jesus. Look, we all, we all wonder why. This is my point. We all wonder why. And again, it is a part of the refining process. If we are continuing to do life and not paying attention to what is going on around us, I'm telling you, it is real easy for us to get really off the path that God has in front of us, the path that He wants us to follow. And this is why sometimes, no, not sometimes, things get shaken up in our lives. And those things that you know that are hindering us or keeping us from moving in the way that God would have us, in the fashion that look, he got to prune those things. Look, look, look, look. Let me show you something real script, real quick in scripture. Look, he says to us, let me go to it. Look, in Hebrews 12, y'all, excuse me, I'm clicking, I'm clicking here. In Hebrews 12, he says, Verse 5 and 6, he says, For for ye have forgotten the exaltation which speaketh unto you as unto children. My son, despise not thou the chastening of the Lord, nor faint when thou art rebuked of him. He said, For whom the Lord loveth, he chastiseth, and scourgeth every son whom he receiveth. Ye, you can find excuse me. That was a part of a yeah, I'm looking at. Let me tell you where I'm looking at it from. I'm looking at uh Bing. I just pulled up a couple scriptures that I need to read out here for you for everybody. And so he says, Come on back to the verse. Because it was telling me something else. Excuse the error. But he says, For whom the Lord loveth, he chastised it. You heard me? Look, we ask, we asked the question, why? God loves us at the end of the day. The why is because he loves us, he loves us, he loves you. Don't ever, ever, ever look, no matter what is going on in your life, no matter what is happening, don't ever, ever, ever question the love of God for you. Now, how do you react to what is happening? Let me just give you a moment to thinking about think about that. How do you react to the things that are happening in your life? Do you have to deal with your do you deal with and you know I guess you could probably point this to in a in a in a negative fashion. Do you get angry? Do you spaz out? Like, do you get anxious? Do you get worrisome? Do you become fearful? Things of those natures. Okay. Look, I'm here to say this to you. And this is Spirit told me this as I was preparing. He said, any emotional response is human nature. Okay? If you are having an emotional response to what is happening in your life, it is normal. Woman of God, man of God, it is normal to respond. Look, don't be so spiritual that you're no earthly good. Do you hear what I'm saying? Even Jesus Himself had to come down. He stepped out of heaven and came here on the earth, and he experienced what it was like to be wrapped up in the flesh. Even though he didn't sin, he could feel. Do you hear what I'm saying? Look, here's a good example. How many times did Jesus, in the midst of healing and and and and teaching that the people were so worrisome, the weight was so heavy. The Bible teaches us, it tells us he just went away. He had to go away and talk to his father. Because it was intense and it was heavy. The level of intense intensity intensity that we experience as human beings. And it just trips me out to watch my brothers and sisters struggle to try to keep it together when really they're falling apart. The Lord don't expect us to fall, don't expect us to keep it together all the time. Because here's the thing: if we could, then Jesus wouldn't have had wouldn't have had to do what he did on the cross for each and every one of us. You hear what I'm saying? Jesus Himself looked in that cup and he said, Let this cup pass from me. No less, let thy will be done. Let thy will be done. Excuse me, y'all. This is what he said. He looked in the cup. He's saying to myself, Oh my gosh. But at the end of the day, it ain't about me. And that's that that that at the end of the day, this is this is a resolve we gotta come to as we deal with life's trials and tribulations and in the refining process. At the end of the day, it's not about us, it's about the Father, it's about the things that he wants to accomplish through us. He was accomplishing some things through his son Jesus. Jesus looked at that cup and said, wait a minute. Here's our reality. We don't know what exactly what our cup is gonna look like on the inside, but there's a willingness that says, no matter what's on the end or the outside of the cup, I'm gonna do what it is that the Father desires to do through me. Hallelujah. I use myself as an example. Like grieving was something that I didn't want to entertain. I didn't want to feel the feelings, the feelings that was attached to grief. I just wanted to get on past it and get back to what I knew I had to do in regard as in the role of a mother, as a wife, as a pastor, as a leader, as a, you know, as a voice in the travel world, as this and as this and that. Like at the end of the day, because I still struggle with grief myself. I was just on our vacation a couple of days ago in February, and I seen a young man with a duffel bag, and just immediately my son came to mind and said, that is something he would have been doing. Walking and talking, carrying this heavy duffel bag, and my tears, my eyes began to fill with tears, like, oh man, I miss him. Like at the end of the day, I don't want to, I don't want to feel those feelings, but I thank God for those feelings at the same time. Because it just briefly reminds me of the fact that I am still human. Yeah, I might be an influencer, I might be a podcaster, I might be a pastor, I might be a wife, a mother, I might be all of these things in the world, in the world, but I'm still a human being and I got feelings and emotions. Don't dismiss your feelings and emotions. Do you hear what I'm saying? Because look, in the midst of the process, God said, Look, I I could not touch the word. Do you hear what I attempted to open up the Bible and read the Bible and things of that nature, and I just could not. I didn't touch the word for I know it was at least two months. And the Lord said, No, you can't, you can't go any further. You have to sit right there where you are. You gotta deal with how you feel, you gotta deal with it. And and you know, as time passed, you know, God, He let me know I gave you what you you already had what you needed to be able to survive that season. To be able to survive the initial impact of losing your child. He said, I already get you already had it in you, I've already filled you up to be able to be able to have enough to survive. Do you hear what I'm saying? Like there for a person who is dealing with malnutrition, they have enough up to a point. And and dealing with grief for myself, we in in that regard, God had already given me enough spiritual strength to be able to fight the war that was going on within. Hallelujah. Without allow without me getting caught up in that moment where I was. Do you hear what I'm saying? Like he's giving you what you need to be able to side just to be able to survive what you're going through. It's a part of the process. Look, this process is bringing you value. You heard what I'm saying? You're being look, you're able to shine for the glory of God. Do you hear me? You're able to shine like that diamond. You are a diamond, but the diamond goes through so much in order to get its value, in order to get its clarity, in order to get its unique, it goes through an enormous amount of pressure and uh darkness and alone and and pain and heat. It it has to survive all of that before it can ever be shaped and formed. Look when you look at the process, it won't make sense because you are in the middle of it. It won't make sense because you're in the midst of the thing. Hallelujah. You hear me? Like pause for a minute and slow down. And begin to talk to the Lord and ask him, God, what are you what is happening right now? I promise you, I promise you, I promise you, he will make it make sense. But it never makes sense while you're in the midst of it. The thing he's trying to teach you. Now, whether that thing that he's trying to teach you, whether the thing that he's getting rid of, whatever is going on in that moment, it's probably something small that later on you see the big, you'll see the bigger picture because you'll be like, oh wow, if that hadn't happened, then this wouldn't have happened. If that hadn't passed, if my son had not passed away, then some things that are now birthed, they wouldn't be. Now, look again, if my son, if he had not taken him home to be with the Lord, with him, then I wouldn't be talking to you right now. Because in the midst of after the the the the I guess you could say the heaviest part of the grief had passed, it wasn't until then that I could even give hope. I could not give it. Look, my baby, he was the one who came up with the anonym Hold On Pain Ends. Because we were looking for an anonym for our ministry. ELCM Hope Community Center. The mission was to was to say to people who came to us that it ain't over. You don't have to quit. It's not over, it's never too late. When you got the Lord, you got all that you need. And he just kinda, you know, hit very laid back, stayed to himself. But that particular day, he just popped out. Hold on, pain ends. And it was like, yes. Oh my gosh. Like, where did that come from? Like at the end of the day, the Lord wants us to have hope. And you know, though my son, he might not, he might feel like he he wasn't very significant, but God used him mightily. Do you hear what I'm saying? Look, you might not, you might seem like it might feel like you're not making a big difference, a big impact, but I promise you, you are. You know how I know? Because you're a child of God. Hallelujah. You are a child of God. It does not make sense in the midst of what you're going through. But I just want to encourage you today not to give up. Don't quit. Don't quit. Because if you quit, then you're giving up on God. Don't give up on God. Look. We come back to the question. Why God refines what he values. And it's simply that. It's simply this. It's because he loves you. Because he loves you. John 15, verse 2. It says, Every branch in me that beareth not fruit, he taketh away. And every branch that beareth fruit, he purgeth it. Meaning he he he it's like being pressed down and then comes back up. He said he purgeth it, that it may bring forth fruit, more fruit. You hear what I'm saying? Like he wants you to shine brighter than ever, ever. Every season that you go through, everything that is released, everything that is getting rid gotten rid of, look, it's meant for you to shine brighter. Just like a plant. I don't know if you've ever pruned a plant. Look, if you don't get rid of the dead leaves, then the dead leaves will kill what is alive. You hear what I'm saying? It will kill what is alive. And so therefore, look, he has to get rid of the things that are devaluing you so that you can be become more and more valuable as time passes. Look, my son, he passed away at 25 years old. But look, do you hear what look, look, look, pay attention now. He's alive and well. Do you hear what I'm saying? Through his mother and through everyone that loved him, while he was here on this earth. Do you hear me? He lives on. So therefore, yeah, he was valuable while he was on the earth. But now that he's home to be with the Lord, he's even more valuable because he is able to shine brighter because he's there. Hallelujah. Hallelujah. So, why God refines what he values, it's because he loves you. Let's pray. Father, I thank you so much for every heart that you brought here on today. I pray the blessings of the Lord will be upon them, God. I pray, God, that you would show them their value, what they cannot see, God, that you would reveal. By your grace and your mercy, I thank you so much that you've allowed me, allowed me a seat at the table as you transform, as you shift and change the minds and hearts of your sons and your daughters. Continue to use me, Father, for your glory, to your glory. God, I pray this prayer. Pray it all in the precious name of Jesus Christ. We do pray. I do pray. Amen. Amen. Amen. Amen. And amen. Hallelujah. Amen. I hope that you will join my community on WhatsApp. It is God's Diamond Network. Go to WhatsApp, put in that title. You will find me wherever you are listening to this, whether Spotify, Apple Music, whatever. Please put your comments. Let me know. Give me some feedback on how this is helping you. Um, I my my make my biggest prayer that is that you are impacted in a in a in such a way that God can reveal to you what he's saying to you privately that you might announce it publicly. Hallelujah. I pray that this is a blessing to you because you are surely a diamond meant to shine. And so next week, I want to invite you to come back because I'm gonna be talking about when pressure is proof of calling, when pressure is proof of, let me go on and add your calling. Okay, your calling is attached to the pressure. So next week we're gonna be talking about that, staying with the same scripture of Zechariah 13 and 9, and of course, we're gonna have some side scriptures, but I so appreciate you staying here vibing with me for a little bit as we go and we uh discuss today why God refines what he values. I hope it all made sense to you, and I hope you'll come on back with me. Join the community, follow me on the Facebook page. Also got an Instagram page, God's Diamond Network, Facebook page God's Diamond Network. Uh, you can follow me personally if you like Catherine Brown on Facebook. Um, got a TikTok page. I'm all over the place. Yeah, social media. I got a YouTube God's Diamond Network as well. So come on, join the family. Um, if you want to sew into the ministry, you can do that as well. Uh, if you want to talk to me via email, you can put in support at godsdiamondnetwork.com. Support at God's Diamond Network. I look forward to serving you wherever you are. Um, and look, let's not forget about DDE, which is Diamond Destiny Ecosystem. 10 participants at a time, the first three days, three-day reset. It is the initiative in that is to bring awareness. You know something is off, you know something, right? I or even if you're just curious, it's cost you$75. I don't want to keep the price hidden from anybody, but because you're you're look, it it is not for me. You are investing in yourself. Hallelujah. But there's so much work to be done. I gotta tie. God said, You got to, you gotta put a tag on it. Ain't about me, it's all about you. Have a blessed day. Come on back with me next week. Amen.

unknown 32:42

Amen.